Premier League Stats 2023? Key Numbers Every Fan Must See

20/07/2025 David

Right, so I wanted to dive into the Premier League numbers for 2023, right? Everybody just throws tables at you, useless. Had to figure this out myself.

Getting Stuck Immediately

First, went looking. Mistake. Big mistake. Went to all the usual football sites. Stats sections buried like treasure nobody wants. Clicked through twenty different menus, I swear. Ended up with basic crap like “most goals.” Who cares? Needed the real stuff.

Tried an “official source.” Ha! Laughed myself silly. Wanted me to sign up, pay money, probably sell my soul. For numbers that should be free? Forget that.

Finally Found Something Real

Gave up on big sites. Found this tiny stats community forum. Hidden gem. Some bloke shared a raw data dump. Wasn’t pretty, but gold. Spreadsheet format. Columns everywhere. Messy, but had everything: touches in the box, progressive carries, goalkeeper sweep-up actions – all of it.

Sat down for hours with this monster spreadsheet. Coffee went cold. Twice. Did:

Sorted players by non-penalty goals per 90. Forget the penalty merchants.
Calculated actual midfield engine stats – total distance covered + tackles + key passes. Who really runs things?
Found who got fouled most and won the free kick. The real annoying buggers for defenders.
Worked out the conversion rate for keepers saving shots from outside the box. Turns out most let in way more long rangers than you think.

Got obsessive. Built my own little dashboard thing in another spreadsheet. Charts popped up. Surprises everywhere.

What Actually Sticks In Your Head

All that digging? Worth the pain. The boring headline stats lie. Here’s the messy truth every fan actually needs to see:

The player who created the most “big chances” didn’t even get half of them finished. Brutal.
The team everyone thought parked the bus? Had the third highest passes into the final third. Just sucked at using them.
That “rock solid” defender? Got dribbled past more than anyone in the top half. Got bailed out constantly.
The attacking midfielder everyone drools over? His key passes came mostly from corners. Open play? Nearly invisible.

My laptop fan sounded like a jet engine by the end. But those numbers? Don’t lie. They tell you the real game, the stuff the pundits miss chatting nonsense on telly.

Anyone wants to see my messy spreadsheet, hit me up. It’s ugly, but it’s honest. Better than any polished official rubbish.